I Eat Yogurt Now.

This blog used to be at vintagepixieboots.blogspot.com, but then I started eating yogurt and my dear friend Hannah got what we post-graduation lost souls like to call “a real job,” and now I’m just half-dressed, because (seriously) I really don’t have it together.

I have pieces. But I certainly don’t have all my deer in a line. Triceratops in a triangle? Platypuses in a polygon? Elephants on an elliptical? Oddly, that first sentence did not even have alliteration, but that was quickly forgotten.

So here’s the lowdown:

I’m a college grad.

I hate working in retail, but have come to the bitter realization that it is the bread and butter of the underemployed. Retail makes me hate humanity, but it’s also a great motivator!

I love shoes, and I don’t wear high heels enough. This sad fact is mostly due to my retail job, which is at a hardware store. YEAH, I SELL SCREWS. DEAL WITH IT.

I’m ticklish and I hate being tickled. If you’re ticklish, you understand. If you’re not and you try to tickle me, I’ll probably punch you in the face (inadvertently).

My dream is to be a massage/physical therapist/yoga super hero, but it might take a while. And lots of dough.

I am probably the only girl in the history of the world who has a Victoria’s Secret credit card and has only used it once.

I have an old boss who dresses like an elf. Still not sure how I feel about this, but my first emotion was pride.

Prior to two weeks ago, I hated yogurt. Apparently I just wasn’t putting enough blackberries and granola in it.

Fashion is what happens on the runway (it mystifies me), but style is what you do with it (much more understandable).

This blog is not just a style blog. It’s an everything blog, documenting my “adult” life. It should really just have a giant road sign that says “Work In Progress.”

Stick with me. It will be a fun adventure.

Also, it’s never too late to start eating yogurt.

This penguin, sitting on the carbonated beverages shelf in Jewel, has it more "together" than I do.

This penguin, sitting on the carbonated beverages shelf in Jewel, has it more “together” than I do.